As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present outcome, that many people would be kept alive [as they are this day].
Genesis 50:20 AMP
Pain is a part of life that we simply cannot avoid. It is a force that sometimes collides with our worlds with enough power to knock the wind out of us. When we’ve been hurt one of the easiest things to do is shut down. Depending on the level of pain, we disconnect from the person and run from every memory and moment we’ve had, good or bad. With a total stranger this is easy, but what do we do when the person is a huge part of our life?
At 21, events began to unfold in my family that resulted in my father leaving in 2015. It was hard to watch the people I love fall apart, and it was overwhelming to deal with the multitude of emotions that washed over me. I felt robbed, cheated and discouraged. Initially, I vilified my father in an attempt to cope and, for a time, it was easy to be angry with him. It wasn’t until I realized that, in doing this I’d also covered every good and special moment we had together in filth, that I began to prepare my heart for change.
The day God sought to restore me, He told me to go to a local fast food restaurant for a chocolate shake. This place was special to me because it was the very place my father took me for father-daughter time. It was a place of affirmation and acceptance, a place I had not even looked at in passing in years. That day, as I pulled into the drive-thru, I was beaming with joy. I nestled back in my seat and, with the first bite, was washed in my heavenly Father’s love and joy for me. I smiled at the memory of all the good times I’d had with my Earthly father. Things may not have been as I would have liked them, but I simply couldn’t throw out the good because I was hurting.
That small act of taking back something that was precious to me gave me strength to keep fighting for the promises concerning my family. It’s taken me a long time to learn to go against the grain and remain consistent in love in the face of pain but, there is treasure in every situation. When it comes to being whole, we have to know what belongs to us, no matter what has happened. If it was good then it’s still good now and it can be the one thing God uses to keep love and hope alive in your heart.