“Lord, my spirit is in an uproar but not for the right things. I am in a whirlwind again and I need to rest. I am not having my Mary moments, it’s been a Martha kinda of time.”
It was early in the morning, the air felt very crisp, the sun hid behind an overcast sky. Silence allowed for the fluttering of feathers from the early birds. As I headed down the street for a short walk my voice began to speak from deep within my heart.
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Luke 10:41-42 NIV
Summer has finally come to an end, now that the school year has begun. This time it’s not the normal season change. It’s all different. I usually am geared up to take the kids to their first day of school. In the past I’ve prepped this day with a good Mom “Hurrah!”, breaking out the pom-poms and pouring confidence into their youthful hearts with warm smiles and comforting hugs.
But instead, lunches were being packed as if we are way into the school year. I closed the door behind me with quick goodbyes and off I went. Not able to grasp the fading moment, I realize with a sigh…this is too different. This is my first awareness of my “Martha Moments”.
It too was my first day of school (I’m an assistant educator). My feeling of uncertainty was at its highest point. Over the summer I was trained for a new position. Additionally, there also were new supervisors and new co-workers. To put it this way, it was NOT like coming home from vacation back to the coziness of your own bed.
To top it off, it was the first week of a big change for my husband. He also was switching gears to a new job. Ack! What else could be new for my family? Oh yes, we were getting accustomed to a new puppy. The responsibilities of that cute fur-ball alone made me devolve into a crazed women, I had to admit!
We had a bunch of unknowns erupting. New routines, teachers, bosses, finances, adjustments to be made left and right, and a puppy who really needed to hurry up and figure out the best place to pee was on the grass outside.
It took some time to figure out my spirit was slowly being squeezed tightly with no room to breathe. My “Martha moments” were not sudden, it was a slow progression. In fact, I am sure I was the only one in my home to chuckle at my craziness. Especially when I remembered the verse:
It is better to live in a desert land than with a contentious and vexing woman.
Proverbs 21:19 NASB
No, it wasn’t really funny. The desert would be a better place. It’s ridiculous how unsettling I really had become.
The best way I can explain my own “Martha and Mary moments” is like this…
It’s like I got to a point in my mind that if I was in a “crowd” I wouldn’t care who I pushed out of my way. I became caught in nerves of busyness. I didn’t stop to seek God!
Rather than having my “Mary moments” (my clear-headed self, that actually could stand in the “crowd” to see who was in need), I was sitting in the corner silenced by the whirlwind, and stuck there with a great desire to relax, to breathe and ease into every moment, confident that each step could be trusted by God.
This past year I was taught by very wise ministry leaders the need to, rest. Now I understand more than ever why it is always best to take a knee. Please see my mistake. Especially in the moment when life shifts. Just stop.
…And rest at the feet of Jesus.
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”
2 Corinthians 3:17 NIV
After the end of the heavy week of our new beginnings, I sought God with my crumpled up heart and He reminded me…
Be still and know I am God …
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
My heart prayed, “Thank you Lord for your glory resides as I hear your gentle voice calling to me.” Now that was a sweet invitation to my own heart to see his heart for me.
The best part, it is never too late to take that time. We have a loving God, who picks us up with all that dirt smeared on our pretty little dresses. The very moment we turn to him, he is waiting and wanting to give us freedom from it all.
Remember to have your Mary moments!
Jeanette has worked in church ministry, lead in women’s ministry, and is passionate for caring for the hearts of individuals. She lives in Southern California with her husband and two beautiful children. After being blessed with several years at home, dedicated to caring for her beloved family, she re-entered the work force in 2013, trusting in the Lord entirely along the way.
Her outward heart and passion for people has grown from God who has shown his continuous amazing and abundant qualities of love in her own life. She often sees her visionary self as a faithful warrior. At times worn, dirty and strong, or carried in a sea of tirelessly galloping hooves among a mighty army, and sometimes preparing and polishing her weapons as she watches the enemy from a distance running amok. This fighter in her has many years of strength training from spent time getting to know Jesus . She believes her journey has far greater places to travel onward, knowing there is heavy labor ahead yet wants nothing but to pursue our God of great wonder.