Terrible screaming suddenly broke my beautiful sleep. It was 1:20 in the morning on May 2nd, 1995. I could hear fear and sadness coming from my Mom’s cry. My mind raced as I jumped out of bed grabbing a large pair of scissors thinking there was an intruder.
I followed the sound into my parent’s bedroom and peeked around the corner to see if anyone uninvited was there. My heart sank as I saw my mom holding my Dad in her arms, sobbing. Something was terribly wrong. Dropping the scissors I ran to their bedside and took my Dad’s hand. He felt cold and lifeless. At that moment, the reality of what happened hit me like a ton of bricks. Denial set in as my mind was telling me this hadn’t happened.
But holding his hand, I knew his spirit was already gone and just his body remained. Some fearful tears were shed, and I ran outside to wait for the paramedics. Waiting for them felt like eternity. I yelled at the sky and pleaded for them to come quickly. Finally, they drove over our little hill and I frantically waved my arms yelling for them to hurry. We all ran inside and they started working on my Dad’s lifeless body. I remember my Mom asking me if He was going to be okay. “Of course He is. He’s going to be fine, He has to be.” I told her.
She wasn’t sure and I would repeat my hopeful lie. I knew my Dad was not okay but I couldn’t accept that this was happening to me, to us. Time passed as they finally put him on a stretcher to take Him to the hospital. We were then ushered into the back of a police car to be transported there. I don’t remember much about that car ride other than feeling completely numb. My life was changing and I couldn’t do anything about it.
My Mom and I clung to each other as we waited in a room the size of a phone booth. The doctor came in and informed us that my Dad had died from a heart attack. He was only 43 and I was only 16. It was too soon for my Dad to leave this Earth. There was so much I didn’t know, so many questions I still had to ask, so many life experiences to share together. I knew very little about life and I would never be able to ask Him for advice again.
My dad was a great Dad. He was always up for throwing a baseball or playing cards. He taught me how to laugh and stay light-hearted about life. He taught me to try hard and to never give up. He was a big dreamer and businessman. He was also great with people and everyone liked him. He accomplished many things in his industry, the music world and knew many people.
I remember his funeral being packed. We took His ashes on a boat at Swami’s beach. The beach was crowded with mourning people on the sand as well as the bluff. Surfers paddled out and surrounded the boat to participate in songs and the spreading of His ashes. It was beautiful and I was so happy to see what an impact my Dad had on the people around him. But there was so much about my Dad that I never got to know. He was taken too soon.
I am so thankful for the memories of all the special times but I wish my dad wrote a book. A book for me to read, to tell me of all his accomplishments, his failures, his dreams, and how he overcame and persevered through hard times. A book to tell me of His love for me and the things He’d like to share with his grandchildren that He would never meet. A book to say all the things he never had the chance to say.
I’m so grateful to God that He gave me such a wonderful Dad to shine His love through. And I’m so grateful that I can read the Book my Heavenly Father wrote for me. I can read about God’s love and the love of family and thank God for mine. I have learned so much about life, love and family through reading God’s written word.
Dear reader, please, don’t take the Bible for granted. It is a love letter from our Heavenly Father and I am so thankful I have the privilege to read it everyday.
In His Love,
Lavender Morningsong (yes, that is her name) is a Southern California native. She grew up in Leucadia, San Diego, as a beach baby and lived on what she likes to call a mini farm. She lived a wild life until meeting the Lord when she was 19 years of age.
Lavender has been married to her best friend for fifteen years and has three spunky children to keep her busy. She has done many things and held different occupations, but her one passion is the Lord. Through every season of life, her one desire is to grow closer to the Lord and be transformed into His image. Through her experiences and imperfections, she hopes to inspire others to not give up hope, to feel normal, to laugh, and continue to run this crazy, beautiful race we are running.