I have an eleven-year-old daughter. She means everything to me. She is my first born. My mini me. From the moment I found out that I was pregnant with her at twenty years old I knew my life was forever changed. One, because I still possessed my first cabbage patch doll, (Gabby Noel, that I held for years as a young kid as I dreamed about a real daughter). Two, because now I had a reason to fight for the value of my own life and that meant I had to start making hard adult decisions.
My daughter, Aria is the spit ‘n image of me. She looks like me, she acts like me, and she thinks like me. Therefore I am the perfect mom for her. This is one of the biggest blessings I could have ever been given! Sometimes, when I speak with women, they say that their moms told them in a frustrated and harsh tone, “I hope when you get older you have a daughter just like you.” It seems like it is spoken in such a derogatory way that it turns into a curse. In my case I view it and claim it as a blessing. Sure we’ve had our moments (Especially during homeschool) when we felt like one of us wasn’t going to last to see the end of the day. There have been tears and loads of female hormones in the midst of misunderstandings and hurts. But I wouldn’t change a thing or give up the opportunity to experience the joy of having a child who is made in my image.
Do you know that’s actually what the term spitting image means? It implies that the person is made in the same spirit AND image of the other person. And I know this to be extremely true with my girl.
Because she is the spirit and image of me, I can enjoy her process and love her well in the midst of her mistakes and shortcomings. They are called professional mistake makers for a reason right? Even though sometimes I’ve felt more like Anne Sullivan teaching Helen Keller in our relationship, I’ve found that my ability to parent her well comes straight from experience in receiving grace from Jesus.
I have so much faith in Jesus’ ability to redeem and restore, that I have so much grace for my mini me in her life journey. I am not scared of sin. I am not scared of people’s choices. Yes, consequences of our choices stink, and hitting rock bottom in life is not what any parent wants for their kids but, I can love without fear in my parenting because I know that God is good and that He is creative in the midst of chaos.
So in parenting my little brown-eyed gorgeous beauty who is too smart for her own good, I can keep the goal of parenting extremely easy. My goal is to connect to her heart. To continually pull her close to me no matter what her behavior is or how her choices have affected me or other people. I pull her in and remind her of who she is. I identify with her struggle of growing up and being pulled in so many ways. I tell her what is waiting for her as she continues to pursue truth and love. I can’t wait to see all that she becomes. I know her destiny is great and she will be more powerful and influential than I will ever be. I can’t wait to support her dreams and passions as they develop… and I’m prepared for a granddaughter in who we will also be able to say is the spit’n image of us gals!
Redefined By Grace,