It’s Friday evening (after work), I rub my eyes as I sit texting my husband. We went back and forth trying to determine who would go to pick up our son from daycare. He was still working so I did it. I turned on music and rubbed my eyes as I waited in stop-and-go traffic from downtown Los Angeles to Orange County. Finally, I exit the freeway knowing my smiling baby boy is only minutes away.
I get home, there’s mail to retrieve, dinner to be made and preparation for the weekend activities. I put on some smooth jazz, light a couple candles and finish preparing dinner and then realize I had not even changed out of my suit from work. Feeling more tired than usual, I push through and give the baby a bath, get his pajamas on to get ready for bed. I’m still rubbing my eyes. I ask myself “Why am I still rubbing my eyes?”
It’s Saturday morning and just to be safe, I make a same day appointment at the doctor. We have breakfast and straighten up the house. At this point everything’s so blurry, my eye sockets hurt, my eyes feel so swollen. Then the conversation in my head starts, “You’re freaking out girl! No I’m not, Yes you are! No I’m not! Okay Angela it’s time to listen to yourself, something is not right!”
At the doctors’ office, I then began the discussion between myself and God, “Lord this Dr.’s appointment is going to be quick right? You know my work week. Either way, your word says in Romans 8:31 if God is for us who could be against us?” I laugh, shake my head, kiss my man, rubbed the baby’s face and walked in as my name was called.
We exchange niceties. I sit, the light goes out, the exam begins. He shined the light into my eyes and I immediately knew only Jesus could handle this because the pain was excruciating and if I cried he would not be able to complete the exam. I was told I had a severe case of Optical Neuritis and to see a Neurologist.
It’s now Monday, neither of us go to work, and I make a same day appointment to see a neurologist. I have an MRI and a spinal tap. We’re at the office door, she’s on the phone and waves at us to come inside and sit. She’s chewing gum, blows a bubble, smiles at us and continues her conversation, “Yes, yes, I agree it could always be worse, yeah, exactly. Okay, thank you for responding.” She hangs up, looks at us and states, “I agree with the radiologist you have Multiple Sclerosis.” Just like that. Where was her bedside manner!
We were devastated! We didn’t know what MS was and had not even heard of it in 2003. We look at each other with tears in both of our eyes, lock hands and I say, “M what?” She says, “You have Multiple Sclerosis, the cause of it is unknown and there is no cure for it. It’s an Auto Immune Disease, simply put, it stops your body from moving.”
“I am so sorry for your family, take these videos and you and your husband go home and choose what medical injection will be best for you and your family. There’s once a week, daily or monthly and with all the research on the rise; there will be pills offered in no time.” I’m crying and my watch reads two twenty-four p.m. January 24, 2003.
Here’s where I got into trouble, when I began to make, create and dream up comparisons of the Angela before MS versus the one to come. My vision was quickly approaching a total loss in both eyes. I remained this way for 47 days. The darkest days of my life, literally and figuratively.
At night time I began to have dreams of my future and about my husband having gray hair. These dreams gave me hope that I would have a future. The two things I had that helped me through that time was gratitude and prayer.
But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.
I was grateful to God that I knew in my heart he was with me and I was not alone. After prayer and fasting for nine days my eyesight was restored! I was healed! I stood on his word, believed it and it came to pass.
Know that you are loved,
Angela a.k.a Truffle
What is Multiple Sclerosis
I am a MS Ambassador, it allows me to bring awareness to others about the disease, since diagnosis, over the years my Team and I have raised over ten thousand dollars. Currently MS has no cure.