I am a lover. A feeler of all things. The core of who I am craves deep connection and love with others. I don’t do small talk well because I want to know the depths of the people around me. This has led to incredible relationships with incredible people. Once I make a connection with someone, watch out! I dive in and strive to make a connection to the beat of who they are. I want to get down into what makes them tick, who they are and why. This is what makes me tick and what excites my emotional nerve endings. If I don’t find that connection at first, I will keep coming after and seeking it. This can be a little tricky for a deep lover like myself because not everyone wants that connection…with me. People like myself that love deeply, also hurt deeply. We tend to have raw emotional nerve endings. Everything about us has to do with the heart and how we feel. This has led to a lot of hurt in the past. It has allowed the enemy to get into my head and play on the insecurity that I am unlovable. It has led to heartbreak in friendships, romantic relationships and even in ministry.
You may be thinking to yourself that I probably have a lot of trust issues or that I have learned to guard my heart and have several walls up. Nope. I am still very open and continue to seek after meaningful bonds. You may wonder how I can throw my heart out there so easily over and over again. Why would I keep coming back for more? Because…I keep coming back to love.
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.” 1 Corinthians 13:6-8
Love NEVER fails. I refuse to believe otherwise. The Lord made me a lover. He knit those sensitive, loving, emotional threads together ever so delicately and spoke them into existence. How can I turn my back on who and what he made me to be? How can I balk at the gift that has been so gently bestowed upon me and woven into the fabric of who I am? Simple…I can’t. I choose love. It’s the very essence of who Jesus is. It is THE thing He wanted us to be. LOVE. When it’s beautiful. When it’s deep. When it’s powerful. When it makes you laugh until your sides hurt. When it’s overwhelming. When it’s messy. When it’s hard. When it’s unappreciated. When it hurts. When it takes everything you have. When it seems like it’s the last thing you want to do. LOVE.
Have you ever looked into the face of someone as a simple hug or conversation made their eyes twinkle, the corners of their mouth turn up into a smile? Have you felt your heart swell for another person? Have you heard the giggle of a child moments after you tell them, “I love you to the moon”? Have you ever seen a teenager let down their guard a little? Have you seen hope in someone’s eyes? Those are the reactions to love. These are the reasons I choose love. Above all else, no matter what. I encourage you to choose love also. There is no greater calling than to love.